herbiehancock

"Next" left me asking a lot of questions. First: how did they get Julianne Moore? She's totally slumming in this high-concept low-rent sci-fi Nic Flick. Five writers couldn't make sense of a premise that Philip K. Dick introduced in "The Golden Man": a guy has the power to see a few minutes into his future. Nic Cage's Frank Cadillac uses this power for a meager living as a Vegas magician. His ability is akin to keeping his thumb in the last page of a choose-your-own-adventure book. He can see what will happen, and if it doesn't work out for him, change his course of action. It's an interesting premise, but it's mostly used as a bad gag - like a series of misfired pickup lines until he gets it right. Rather than explore the positives and negatives of this limited power, writer Gary Goldman and his team turn him into a cowardly superhero. At times he's heroic - he stops a casino robbery - but mostly he's slovenly and unmotivated. A ...

Yes, in addition to watching St. Nic's movies, I will be collecting related ephemera, satire, mash-ups, odes, art and kitsch. Starting with the Nic Cage Song. Thanks to Graham Linehan (@glinner) for the tip-off.

OK, yeah. You're reading a declared Nic Cage supporter. But "Season of the Witch,"  currently at 4% on Rotten Tomatoes , is not a 4% movie. It's sins are obvious: fuzzy CGI, hammy acting, and bad dialogue, usually culminating in atrocious one liners. But the movie is camp. It's supposed to be overacted and it's not supposed to be taken seriously. Yes, the wolves looked terrible, and the act v twist was incomprehensible, but the bridge scene felt genuinely thrilling and the landscapes were pretty. The makeup and costumes were solid. Nic's hair is good. And Ron Perlman's in it. What more do you want? Some movies rated higher than "Season of the Witch" on Rotten Tomatoes: "Gigli" - 7% "Big Momma's House 2" - 6% "Larry the Cable Guy: Health Inspector" - 5% Oh, and " Bangkok Dangerous " - 9% No fucking way was "Bangkok Dangerous" better than "Season of the Witch." Season of the Witch ...

"Knowing" was a welcome follow-up to "Bangkok Dangerous." Not Cage's best, but a solid thriller. The philosophical scope of the picture was too high-minded, but it's a fun watch if you don't revisit plot holes. "Knowing" has the best end-of-the-world visual effects I've ever seen, primarily because they approached the scene with simplicity. Cage is good in it, if a little understated. Following a crucial discovery, Nic's character is subject to an explosive surprise, that's filmed with an impressive long shot. Knowing - 2009 6/10 Nics

I fought a strong urge to fast forward through the final act of "Bangkok Dangerous." I'm willing to sacrifice substance for style - especially for an action movie - but BK has little of either. I can't compare it to the original, Thai version, from the same directing duo, the Brothers Pang. Nic Cage plays a lifelong hit man who decides to call it quits after one last job. It's predictable, and maybe that's why the filmmakers make some bizarre choices. Cage's conscience is stirred by a romantic but sterile relationship with a Thai deaf-mute store clerk. She's remarkably adept at reading lips - in English - but the date scenes are strangely one sided. As far as action - it's rote, quiet and boring. An gondola shootout/chase on a crowded river is the only scene that has any color, tension or originality. Cage's character possesses the superhuman traits of an action hero (never getting hit by the thousands of bullets fired at him), but none of the...