Saturday, November 13, 2010

Thoughts on Homecoming

-A guy Mike (Matt Long) and his girlfriend Elizabeth (Jessica Stroup) drive to his homecoming (whatever the fuck that is) in his hometown, where his ex-girlfriend Shelby (Mischa Barton) waits with baited breath. So basically, it's Fatal Attraction meets Misery with an added mix of stupid.

-We--me and sister watched this because we were both in fowl moods and wanted to laugh at something in all mean spirits. Except we couldn't even laugh at this, it was so fucking bad.

-Mischa Barton, for one, is awful. Just awful. Like, they're supposed to be in Pennsylvania, yet she has on some quasi-Southern accent. Her line reading is so stilted, her emotional reactions so dull/unsubtle...

-Well, yeah, she isn't really aided by the script, and certainly not the other actors. Matt Long and Jessica Stroup turn in dreadfully generic performances, playing dreadfully generic characters. Plot makes no sense, every single character is an idiot, whether by intention or not.

-I know Mischa Barton can be a good actress sometimes. I've seen Assassination of a High School President. Now, here she is, hoking it up with her tepid knowledge of the East and her Annie Wilkes complex. She even has an axe. My, oh my, Stephen Fry.

(who else saw Community?)

-Director: The unfortunately named Morgan J Freeman.